just another post before going for another break.
current status:in the midst of Mid Year Examinations
Feelings:Mixed
currently, finished most of the papers,left with a few.
sometimes i get the feeling of giving up somemore its during my graduating year.(secondary five)
i wonder why.and i always thought about how determined i was in getting my foundations right from secondary one.that made me take back the way i feel.or even thinking even futher,like,thinking how i didnt do so well for PSLE.went way way back to Primary six.for this, i happily close one eye .then brings me back to secondary two.where that time i worked like crazy for only the first half semester but died off the second semester.how i ever wanted to change stream so badly!well,those days, i dont really know whats been going through my mindset although one thing for sure maybe its the mindset of going to Express stream as maybe i realised,i've been losing out to people and didnt want to feel lost or lose out to people anymore.
after knewing that i cant,obviously its a mixed feelings or indescribable feelings even though on the report book it states that its just a few percent.but to me,it just felt like it was alot of effort lost.Finally right now,from the start of Secondary Five year,the same feelings came back.the feeling of losing out to people.seeing how they continue their educations in JC/Poly,made my heart sour.Then me?Have to be so STUCKED and SUCKISHLY be still in fajar doing my sec 5 year.However,On the contrary,thinking from the start to now,i realise i dont have to feel that way.since im in normal stream and didnt get to express,i should just jolly well study hard and get good grades for Os.at the least to make me feel more contented i tell myself,at least i made it up to secondary five.with the right determination and mindset,i believe even if i never did well for my PSLE,even if the leftout effort i didnt put in secondary two to go Express stream,never did so good for N levels SO WHAT?so what i waste one more year in secondary school to other people's opinion.?O levels i can do so much better and those "good" results are just merely gauges to gauge my way up to O levels .gauges that tell me to persevere on as i move futher into my education.if isnt for it , i dont think i'll be here doing O levels as a secondary five student anymore (:
Haha.
Context:based on a true story of me.
HAHA LOL.CRAP!(: